Living On The Fringes

Jesus was a fringe-dweller.  He was an outcast, out-of-the-loop, in some ways.  He also knew what it was like to be misunderstood, to be judged, overlooked, underestimated.  His experiences allowed Him to understand and care about those of us who are fringe-dwellers.  But He had something else - He had His Father's attention, His Father's affection.  He knew Who He was because He knew Who His Father was.  We have that same certainty because of Jesus.  We know Who our Father is, we know we have His attention and affection.  We know who we are because of Who He is.  We can be a fringe-dweller knowing that He is right here with us, right now.  We are never alone.

Saturday I was able to watch a Christmas play live on the web because a local church cared enough to make it available to those of us who find it more than challenging to be a part of large public events.  They noticed the fringe-dwellers.  They noticed me.  It felt so good to be included.  Just once in awhile, it does feel so good.

Awake In The Middle Of The Night

Here I am, awake in the middle of the night.  Since my late 30's I've had trouble sleeping through the night.  Most of the time I just toss and turn until, hopefully, I go back to sleep.  Not tonight however.  I needed to get up and focus my thinking.  I did have all of those blog posts from fellow bloggers I hadn't read yet, so off I went to dig through them for the gold nuggets of wisdom I knew I'd find.  There are so many gifted writers who have mad communication skills.  Someday, I hope to be one of them, but, for now I'm still finding my way.  The ones I enjoy the most are those that draw out my heart - unveil my innermost thoughts and longings, or even discouragements.  The best, and hardest, to read are those from writers with disabilities.  In spite of, and in the midst of their suffering, they lift up Jesus Christ and boast in their confidence in Him.  They are so transparent about their pain and challenges, and in almost the same breath, remind their readers to look to God for comfort, for peace, for hope.  It's easy to rejoice when you are not in pain, not physically limited, but try it when your head is splitting, or every joint and/or muscle is aching and nothing helps.  They are awake a lot in the middle of the night, too.  So, right now I pray for my friends, for peace, for comfort, for relief from pain, for right functioning of their bodies.  And with them, I thank God for His grace and mercy and soon-coming.

Suffering in Children

I have some pretty wonderful friends, let me tell you.  God has blessed me with women friends that are godly, loving, compassionate, loyal and faithful.  I have learned so much and shared so much with them through the years.  They truly know God because they love others as He does.  I had the privilege of spending time with several of them yesterday and hearing their hearts.  One friend shared about the struggles of her grandchild, born with severe health issues that have been both a burden and a battle for his whole life.  We have been praying for him and his family since he was born.  While he has amazed doctors with his progress and life, he is not where he wants to be.  We will keep praying for his precious life.  Another dear friend shared her daughter's struggle with cancer that began a dozen years ago.  My dear friend would give her life for her daughter's.  We have been praying for her daughter throughout the process of overcoming.  Everyone is weary with the process, but clinging to the One Who is our Hope, the One Who has promised that all things work together for good, and that our end will be far better than we could ever imagine.  Hoping, praying, believing, hurting alongside of - my dear, wonderful friends.  Their children and grandchildren will never know how very precious they are and how very much they are prayed for.  Our God loves us all like that - we are His children, cherished, longed over, laboring with, always loving, always believing in - that's our Papa!

Perservering on December 1st

December 1st.  It is turning out to be a beautiful and sunny day.  I love the sunshine - it makes everything so much better!  It reminds me that God is fully in charge and everything is going to be fine.  I have a friend who once told me, "It will be fine in the end.  If it's not fine, then it's not the end."  Good, huh?  With God, everything will be fine in the end - that's what He tells us in Jeremiah 29.  When gray days seem endless and life seems difficult, it's good to remember the truth that everything will eventually be fine.  None of us is exempt from suffering, no matter what form it takes.  The bad stuff is only temporary.  The good stuff - the stuff that happens in the end - is always and only good!  Yay, God!!

Blind Unbelief

Christians are oft accused of having "blind faith" by critics and supporters alike. Even Christians sometimes suggest that belief in God requires blind faith because there are so many unanswered questions about God. For example, we've all heard the challenge, "If God is good, why is there evil in the world?" Unanswerable questions like these prevent us from packaging God in our own little boxes. Instead, we build a theology that makes sense to us based on what we "know" about God and what we hope is true about God. We struggle to make sense of life as much as we can. After 40 years of seeking, I can say that our questions and seeking are all a part of it. God desires our trust and faith that no matter what happens, He is good and is working all things out according to His purposes. He will not let us box Him in or declare authoritatively that we know the "truth" about Him.

Recently, I read something - can't remember where or by whom - that suggested that unbelievers and atheists reject God out of "blind unbelief." A new concept for me, it made a lot of sense. We all live according to faith if you think about it. Christians have faith that there is a loving and good God who gives purpose and meaning to our lives. Unbelievers have faith that there is no God, neither good nor evil. Believing or non requires faith.

The journey of seeking God is the only way to develop an informed faith, again, either for or against. How can one dismiss God's reality without actively seeking Him? Seems to me that blind unbelief is far riskier and less satisfying than blind faith. We are only blind as long as we cannot see. Jesus said that there are none so blind as those who will not see. For me, God's presence is as obvious to me as the nose on my faith, but after 40 years, what can you expect? How about you? Have you given time to educating your faith or unbelief?

The Problem with Truth

I used to think that truth could only be truth if it were the same for everyone. And, of course, the truth I knew was the truth! In fact, a pastor once said, "In order for truth to be truth, it must be true for all people in all places at all times." When I heard those words, I thought them profound and began to repeat them in any situation that challenged what I knew to be truth. It felt comforting and further settled me into my established line of reasoning.

Then I found out that there are over 3,000 Christian sects in the world . . . all claiming to have the truth!! And that doesn't even include the Hindus, Buddhists, Muslims or any other flavor of religion!! What a shocker!!!! How could all of these people, sincere, seekers of God, wanting to follow the truth, all come up with different truths, all claiming to hear from God??

Just recently it occurred to me that God isn't showing the same truth to everyone. Wow!! What is that about? It would be sooooooo much easier on all of us if He did.

So, now what? I must follow what I know as truth until God reveals something else. Further, I must also allow that He is showing others something else as true. What a challenge that is! I'm so used to insisting that I'm right! (What an opportunity to love others!)

This is my bottom line - God is Who He says He is; He is love personified; He keeps His promises; He has a good future planned for all of us; He never fails or gives up. I could add more, but you get the idea. The rest I just have to give to Him and let Him sort it out.

By the way, I've been sprinkled and dunked, just in case!

Meaning

I'm currently a fan of Facebook, as many are. It's a great way to keep connected with so many with very little effort. It's also a great way to post prayer requests. Just the other day the daughter of a friend asked those who know him to continue to pray for her father, Kurt. We all used to go to church together and have since blown about like seeds in the wind to be planted in other fields. I remember Kurt's tender and gracious heart. He drew people to God through loving them and teaching about God's marvelous grace.

Kurt has struggled for some time with Crohn's and was just recently in the hospital in critical condition. He is now recovering at home and is struggling with an issue that many do who have chronic life-impacting conditions. What is the purpose of my life now? Why am I here? What am I do do now?

Anyone who has struggled with chronic illness or another life-restricting condition knows just what I I'm talking about. There are no easy answers for any of us. In the world, and yes, even the church, productivity is always the answer, so finding your way is not easy.

I have another friend stuck in a wheelchair with MS, with extremely limited use of her body. We talk about these things fairly regularly.

Finding the purpose of our lives is very personal and must be embraced by all alike, healthy or not, limited or not. I've done much soul-searching, and more God-searching, over the last few years. Sometimes I despair of a satisfying answer. Other times, I remember that my life belongs to a loving and merciful God Who has a purpose for all things, even suffering. Even lack of "productivity."

So, here it is: I've come to believe that all things, good or evil, enjoyable or not, fulfill God's plan in some way I may not understand. I don't always understand what God is doing, but I can always trust His purpose and intent toward me and toward us all. His thoughts toward us are always good and He promises that our end is good. If I look at life's circumstances for my life's meaning, I will always be standing on shifting sand. I choose, and encourage you to choose, to stand on the Rock Who will never let us falter or fail. One day all things will be restored. In the meantime, we can trust Him to lead us and guide us and to make sense of our lives. Amen!!

Contentment

I have a friend who is given to profound one-liners on occasion. About once a month we catch up by phone, updating one another and sharing our challenges. Somewhere in the conversation he will inevitably say, "What will it matter in a hundred years?" We both wind up laughing and I say, "Not even a hundred!" It puts things into perspective for both of us, and we realize the the concerns that occupy us today won't even be a memory in the not-to-distant future.

He has another one-liner that always brings peace to me. If you're like me at all, I frequently bemoan that I'm not "further along" than I am. I "should" myself to distraction. Then my friend gently reminds me, "At any given moment, you are right where you're supposed to be." I let that sink in and I feel the "shoulds" fall away and contentment seeps in. This simple statement acknowledges that God really is in control, and there is nothing outside of His oversight. It recognizes that my life is safely in His hands and that He truly does work the ALL things together for good, especially the "all things" that make me squirm. It lifts the responsibility to perfectly navigate my life on my own.

I've thought about contentment quite a bit, but what is it really? The Apostle Paul said that he had learned to be content in whatever condition he was in. I know that he faced some pretty difficult circumstances with beatings and imprisonments and persecutions. My circumstances aren't nearly as dramatic, but I need to find contentment in my "whatevers." Contentment doesn't mean that you enjoy your circumstances, or that you don't try to change them if you can. Contentment, in my view, is trusting God with your life, clinging to Him no matter what comes, knowing that He will work all things out for your good and His glory. Simple to say, not so simple to do. Some days I do better than others. I remind myself that progress requires the passage of time, and usually far more than I think it should! The bottom line is that all of my "whatevers" make complete sense in the light of His governance. Thank You Papa!!

So, for today, I will be content, trusting Him, depending upon Him and surrendering to the "whatever" that happens today.

Is God Better Than I Think He Is?

Is it possible to believe God to be better than He actually is? Someone once posed this question. Immediately I said, "No!" That is the right answer, isn't it? But, what does that mean, really? I guess the answer would also have to entail a description of what is meant by "better." If I want a new car and God doesn't provide it, does it mean that I'm believing God to be better than He actually is? We can imagine all sorts of things we want God to do for us, the ones we love and the world at large. So, on that level, I would have to answer "Yes!" I feel guilty just thinking that, but if I filter God's goodness according to my desires, I can find many examples where my expectations fall very short of reality.

God's goodness supersedes our human understanding and is not limited to or defined by our circumstances. We define good and evil by how we feel about a particular event. We define suffering as evil. Does God? People suffer and travail in this life. Tragedies happen. Everyone dies eventually, whether they live long or short lives. We can't have a clear understanding of God if we only look at our circumstances. God's goodness takes the long view. Suffering, in some way we don't understand, is part of the process God uses to develop our character and to enable us to trust His character. It separates us from the unimportant distractions and pushes us to seek God for relief and understanding. We are never more close to God than when we are suffering, I believe. Paul talked about our sufferings filling up the sufferings of Christ - yet another mystery. Perhaps he meant that God suffers with us in whatever our suffering is.

We can be confident that our suffering is never wasted, no more than was Christ's. The good news is that He will ultimately heal, redeem and reresurect. LIFE is eternal, not suffering.

The Seduction of Faith

Recently, well really, for some time now, I've been confronted with the inadequacy of faith to produce the results we expect. The teaching floating around leads us to believe that if our faith is strong enough and we are following the right procedures enough and we don't have any "known sin" in our lives, then God will grant us whatever we desire.

Reality doesn't support the teaching. So . . . what IS the problem?? Is it about having enough faith? Jesus said all we needed was faith the size of a mustard seed. I have at least that much, don't you? Jesus' sacrifice paid for all of my sins, or is that just past sins and not current? Hmmm . . . interesting thought. I'll have to puzzle on that one.

Is it possible that the sovereignty of God trumps even the strongest faith? Is it possible that even the unwanted events, including tragedy and suffering and death are tools in His hands to accomplish His purposes? What if God really is in control and everything that happens in life is part of the process?

We scramble for explanations when things don't happen the way we want. The disease isn't cured, the miracle doesn't come, the daughter dies an untimely death. That's when the "enemy" comes in handy - someone to blame, to hold accountable, some evil entity that isn't God. That enemy "got something over" on God, or so the thinking goes.

Do we dare to believe that the loving God we know can be behind the tough places in life? Is it enough to know that our sufferings fill up the sufferings of Christ, as the Apostle Paul says?

I believe that God really is in control and everything and everyone serves Him, knowingly or unknowingly. I can put my trust in His plans and purposes because of who He is. We can never discern accurately who He is by looking at circumstances. Human thinking is "good God equals good circumstances." Obviously God has a plan and purpose far beyond our temporal comfort. God is not formulaic. He is dynamic and real and alive. He has no buttons to push and cannot be pushed beyond His limits. His interaction with us is alive and present and He loves us with a consuming passion. You can't do better than that!